I Loved You First
by HigherThanSoulCanHope
Summary: When Abbies past tests her strength, Jack is there to help her. JA
1. The Murder

**A/N– I don't own any of these characters. Even though I wouldn't mind owning an Ed Green, Jack McCoy and Abbie Carmichael of my own. ;)**

**This will eventually be Jack/Abbie, I just wanted to actually have a plot for once. **

**As for the rating, I just wanted to be safe in case things got..interesting**

"I can give you a ballpark time of death" The ME said, slowly pulling a sheet over the pretty, twenty something brunette lying pathetically in a corner of the large, well kept apartment.

"Enlighten us, please" Lennie drawled sarcastically.

"I'd say anywhere between midnight and two am" The coroner said, pulling off his rubber gloves.

"And as for how she died?" Ed asked, his notebook and pen at the ready.

"Well, she was unconscious for most of it, as far as I can tell." The ME sighed, rubbing his hands over his hair.

"Unconscious for what, exactly?" Lennie asked.

"She was brutally raped before she died. There's seamen everywhere. It looks like he strangled her when he was done."

The two detectives exchanged glances and nodded to the coroner. "Thanks man" Ed said, slapping him on the back.

"I guess a murder weapon is out of the question." Lieutenant Van Buren said, looking over the case files.

"Yeah, but the dude left seamen everywhere, so once we get a suspect it shouldn't be too hard to match him with DNA." Ed said, thoughtfully tapping his pen against his chin.

"_If_, we get a suspect," Lennie reminded him. "He may have disappeared."

"Was there any ID on her?" Van Buren asked, sitting at her desk.

"It was her apartment, registered to a Carrie Ann Burecroft." Lennie said reading from a scrap of paper.

"Well, start there" Van Buren said. "Ask around the building. See if she had any unwanted male visitors hanging around."

"Carrie? Aw, no way. That's a real shame." The portly Italian man said, shaking his head at the picture presented to him by the two detectives. "She was a sweet girl. Always helping me up the stairs when my knee gave out." He patted his left knee, smiling faintly.

"Any chance that you wanted a little more than help from Carrie? If you know what I mean" Lennie asked, smirking slightly.

"What? Oh no, no. She was a pretty girl, but.." He trailed off as a large woman appeared at his side, yelling at him in rapid Italian, shaking a sauce covered wooden spoon at him. He raised his voice to be heard over all the yelling. "As you can see, I don't get out much" He nodded to the detectives and closed the door.

Lennie and Ed stood there, stunned. Then Ed shrugged, and they headed towards the next apartment.

"Think papa Italiano was lying?" Lennie asked.

Ed shook his head vigorously. "Nah man, I once dated an Italian chick, and she was all over me, asking where I was every second of the day, going though my stuff... If he was having an affair, the old lady would know."

Lennie laughed and knocked on the next door. "Thank God for your history with women"

The door opened and a girl in her mid twenties with long, dark curly hair looked at them questioningly. "Can I help you?" She ventured timidly.

"We're hoping so Miss." Ed said, reaching in to his inside jacket pocket. "Did you know a Carrie Ann Burecroft?" He asked showing her the picture of the girl on the morticians table.

The girl's eyes widened and then filled with tears. "Oh my god." She whispered. "Is she...dead?

"Afraid so."Lennie said gruffly. "Do you mind if we come in and ask you a few questions?"

She shook her head. "No, not at all." She opened the door wider so they could come in, and led them to a sofa. "Please, sit down. You'll have to excuse the mess, I just got back from Mexico."

"What's your name, and your relationship to Miss Burecroft?" Ed asked, reaching for his notebook.

"My name is Michelle Maco. I met Carrie about six months ago at a mutual friend's party. We realized that we lived in the same building and were pretty close friends after that. I've been meaning to call her, but I just got back and I've been trying to get reorganized. Not that it would have mattered, right?" She said softly, her lips twisting into an ironic smile, but her eyes filling with tears. She sniffled as the tears began to fall.

Ed handed her a tissue, and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Michelle, I'm sorry to have to ask you questions at a time like this, but did Carrie have any persistent male suitors?"

Michelle dabbed at her eyes with a tissue. "I don't remember her complaining about any male problems. But she did have a boyfriend, Brian Featherson. They split a month or two ago. But I don't think Brian would have done anything to her. The break-up was mutual, from what Carrie told me."

"Well, we're gonna need the name and address of this Brian character anyway, Miss Maco." Lennie said.

"Yeah sure." She agreed, and scribbled down a name and address.

"One last thing, do you know where she worked? We searched the apartment and it looked more like a hotel room than a young woman's apartment." Lennie asked as they stood to leave.

Michelle smiled wistfully. "Carrie was studying to be a lawyer. She worked at Phearson and Steinhoffer. She was married to her job. Working late nights, leaving as soon as the sun came up. It was a wonder I got to see her at all."

The two detectives nodded. "Thanks for your help Michelle. If you think of anything, call this number." Ed said, handing her a white business card.

"Brian Featherson?" Lennie asked the tall, dark-haired young man. The man nodded, and Lennie and Ed flashed him their badges, and led him to a bench by the side walk.

"You know a Carrie Ann Burecroft?" Ed asked, cutting right to the chase. He pulled out the picture and flashed it in the young mans face.

"Yeah, what...is she dead?' He grabbed the picture out of Green's hands and stared at it, shaking. "How did this happen?" He asked, his voice trembling.

"We were sort of hoping you could tell us" Lennie asked, crossing his legs.

"You thought _I_ did this?" Brian looked shocked.

"Well, we heard that you two broke up..." Ed said, trailing off.

"What makes you so sure it was a guy?" Brian asked. "Was she...raped?"

"Bingo." Lennie drawled.

"It wasn't me, I can tell you that much. Our break-up was really mutual."

"So we hear," Ed said. "Care to elaborate?"

"We didn't really...have much of a ...sex life anymore." Brian admitted, looking sheepish.

"Is that why you had to rape her Brian? So you could get laid?" Lennie asked, leaning toward him and raising an eyebrow.

"No man! It wasn't like that." Brain said, beads of sweat breaking out on his face. He bit his lip and started fixedly at his shiny black shoes.

"Then how was it Brian? "Cause, you're not really giving us many convincing arguments here," Ed smirked.

"The reason we broke up was...because..I'm...I'm gay." Brain said, staring determinedly at Green.

"You're gay?" Ed said disbelievingly.

"Yes. Carrie had known for years, and I was afraid to come out to my parents, she was offering me some help by agreeing to come to family functions with me, office things. Then people just sort of got the idea that we were together, and I never did anything about it. Carrie put up with it for a while, then she got sick of playing my fake girlfriend. So, like I said, we broke up, _mutually_ and have just been friends since."

Lennie shot a look at Ed. Ed shrugged and nodded, and the two stood to leave. "Hey Brian, just for kicks, where were you Thursday night?"

Brian sighed. "I was at my parent's house in Connecticut. I finally came out to them, and they weren't happy. Let's just say I'm very glad to be back."

"We're gonna need their number anyway, just to confirm your story." Brian nodded and fished out a scrap of paper and scribbled a name and address on it. Ed slapped him on the back. "Good luck man."

He smiled halfheartedly. "I'll be fine. Just try to get the bastard who did this." The detectives nodded and headed back to the two-seven.


	2. The Problem

**A/N-This kind of just fell off my fingertips, and my brain wouldn't let me sleep till I wrote it and posted it. So I hope you like it. :)**

"So she had a gay boyfriend, no spare time and no real boyfriend to speak of?" Lieutenant Van Buren asked skeptically. "Now, I understand a woman has to work, but a woman also deserves some down time too." There was a knock on the door and she got up to answer to it. A Chinese man stood there, holding two bags laden with food. Van Buren sat back down, and began to rifle through the bags. "Shrimp with Cashews, that you Ed?" He nodded and reached out for it.

"Is there a Lo Mein in there too?" He asked. Van Buren handed it over and tossed a packet of duck sauce at him as well.

Lennie, was who busy working on a pint of Mu Shoo Pork swallowed noisily and nodded. "It doesn't seem to fit. She had to have someone, if not only for a little release, ya know?" He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"Michelle Maco said she was 'Married to her job,' right?" Van Buren asked, reading through the case file and munching on an egg roll.

"Yeah. And her apartment confirmed that. If she hadn't been killed in it, I would have thought no one lived there." Ed said.

"Why don't you check out the office? See if there is anyone there who had been a little more than friendly with Carrie Ann" Van Buren said.

* * *

"You know a Carrie Ann Burecroft?" Ed asked the secretary, flashing her the picture of the deceased girl. 

The secretary nodded wistfully. "I heard about her murder in the paper. A damn shame. Such a bright girl."

"Was there any office gossip around her about Carrie?" Lennie asked, rifling through the day calendar on the desk.

The woman shook her head slowly. "Not that I ever heard. But, then again, the lawyers don't always gossip with me. They're too afraid that I'll report it to the head honchos."

"Well do you know anyone that Miss. Burecroft might have been close with?" Ed asked.

The secretary smiled. "She was closest to a Mr. Frank Percont. They were always working on case files together, he always picked her if he needed help with a brief or anything."

"Do you think there was a chance that they were a little bit more than friends?"Lennie asked, arching an eyebrow theatrically.

"I don't think so," She said, nibbling on her pen thoughtfully. "Frank is married."

Lennie smirked. "Married doesn't always mean celibate."

"Do you think you could point us to his office?" Ed asked, smiling sweetly.

* * *

"Yeah, I heard about Carrie. A terrible tragedy." The lawyer said, extending a hand to the detectives. "Please, sit, make yourselves at home." 

The detectives sat, and Ed began the line of questioning. "You and Miss. Burecroft were close?" He asked.

"Yeah sure. She was a bright girl, and I had taken a shine to her. She was great at writing out briefings, all the boring case work stuff."

"She did all your chump work?" Lennie drawled, crossing his legs.

"No, not at all. She was always glad to help out." Mr. Percont said smiling pleasantly.

"So what you're telling us is that she did all your 'boring' work, and she did it just because it was fun?" Ed asked skeptically.

"Hey, I can't help what she liked to do." Mr. Percont said throwing his hands up. "Carrie asked me if she could help out on a few of my cases, and I let her. I realized how good she was at it, and whenever I needed her help, she was willing to do it. Now, I don't mind talking to you guys, but I have a lot of case briefs to write up, and I'm short one very able bodied assistant."

* * *

Lennie sighed and stood, and Ed followed suit. "If you do happen to remember anything about Carrie Ann, please, give us a call." 

The two men stood outside, contemplating their next move. Ed leaned against the car and yawned. "So what now?"

Lennie was pacing back and forth, stewing. "I still can't understand. Why would she do all that mans work and not get anything in return?"

Ed shrugged. "Maybe she did enjoy it."

Lennie snorted and shook his head. "You ever see Abbie or Jack write up a case brief?"

"Nah, I don't think so," Ed said, scratching his head thoughtfully.

"Well I have. And they hate it. Jack once said that it was what drove him to drink."

"Do you think that Percont had some dirt on her that made her work for him like that?" Ed wondered, opening the car door and sitting down, stretching out his long legs.

"I think we should talk to some of the janitors and cleaning people around the firm," Lennie said, straightening up and heading toward the door.

Ed leapt out of the car and slammed the door. "Maybe they hear things that they shouldn't," He said, following Lennie.

"Bingo," Lennie said, grinning.

* * *

"Did you ever hear Mr. Percont threaten Miss. Burecroft?" Ed asked the tiny Jamaican man sweeping the hallway. 

"Nah manye. If dat nigga evah done threaten Carrie, he shoo would have someting to repay."

"What do you mean?" Ed asked.

"I done hear that girl hollerin' at him more times than I can count. She always yellin' that he overworked her, dat he don't know how talented she be. She even told him once that she done go to the man and tell him that he be overworkin' her."

"Do you know how he kept her quiet?" Lennie asked, after he had deciphered the broken English.

"Nah." The man said, shaking his head.

"When did this last argument take place? When she threatened to go her superiors?" Ed asked, feverishly writing in his notepad.

The man paused and counted on his fingers. "This musta been..'bout Tuesday night?"

"You sure?" Lennie asked.

"Yessir, positive. The missus done made me curry chicken that night," The janitor said, smiling faintly at the memory.

"Aiight, thanks man" Ed said, smiling at him. The janitor nodded, then made his way down the hall.

"Tuesday night." Lennie said. "That was two days before the murder."

* * *

"He had escalating fights with Carrie, the last one ending in her threatening to take him their superiors. This was two days before she was found," Ed informed Van Buren, back at the sation. 

"He told you he didn't know anything?' She asked.

"Not only that, he told us she liked working with him, doing his briefs and whatever." Lennie said.

Van Buren nodded thoughtfully. "Pick him up."

* * *

"So, Miss Slingerland, you and your husband.." Mr. Percont dropped off as the two detectives burst into his office. "Now detectives, really. I'm with a client" 

"Well, that will just have to wait." Lennie jeered, yanking him into a standing position. "Ed, would you like to do the honors?"

Ed grabbed the lawyers wrists and slapped his cuffs on him. He lead him out of the office, reading him his Miranda rights. "Mr. Percont you are under the arrest for the murder of Carrie Ann Burecroft. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you..."

"So, Mr. Percont, do you want to tell us again, this time preferably without lying, what happened to Carrie Ann?" Lennie asked, sitting down across from him in the interrogation room.

" I swear I have no idea. It wasn't me," He protested weakly, wringing his hands.

"You do know that we have an eye witness who can testify that he heard you and Miss Burecroft arguing two days before her murder, right?" Ed stated simply, leaning back in his chair and sipping his coffee.

"That janitor had no idea what it was about," Percont mumbled, more to himself than to the detectives.

"Well, just to straighten us out, would you mind telling us what the argument was about? We wouldn't want that dear old janitor to have the wrong impression," Lennie drawled.

"Alright, if I tell you everything, will I be allowed to leave?" The lawyer asked, glancing pleadingly at Ed.

"If we don't think you're completely full of it," Ed said, leaning towards him. "Give us a shot."

" A few weeks ago, Mr. Phearson, one of the partners came to my office. He told me that Carrie Ann was thinking about filing a sexual harassment suit against him."

"He hit on her?" Ed asked, jotting everything down.

"Yeah, he admitted that she was 'a hot piece of ass' and he 'wouldn't mind hitting that.'" Mr. Percont said, shaking his head. "Phearson wanted me to keep her as busy as I could, so she wouldn't have enough time to file the suit. He also said that if she wasn't around he wouldn't get 'tempted' to do something he would regret. And then, that night the janitor overhead us fighting, I finally told Carrie the truth. She was fuming, and said she would file the harassment suit the next morning. After she left, I called Mr. Phearson and told him what she said. He told me he would take care of it." Mr. Percont said sadly. "I never thought he would do anything like that though, you gotta believe me."

Ed's eyes had grown wider and wider as he took it all in. "So in order to keep her from ruining his career, he killed her."

Lennie shook his head. "Sounds like he got to 'hit that' at the same time. For the record, where were you Friday, mid-afternoon?"

" I was on the Metro North, heading up to New Paltz for the weekend with my wife and kids. I paid for the tickets with my credit card, so you can trace it." Mr. Percont said. "Does this mean I can go now?"

"Yeah, I just have one last question for you. Would you be willing to testify to all of this in court?" Ed asked, standing up.

"Of course. Anything to nail that bastard."

The detectives thanked Mr. Percont and lead him out of the interrogation room. Ed let Lennie lead him the rest of the way, and stopped to talk to Van Buren, who was listening on the other side of the mirror.

"You believe him?" He asked.

"Well, if his alibi checks out, he's got a pretty good case against this Phearson guy. I'm going to call Jack and Abbie. I'm heading to lunch, I'll bring them with me, and see what they think. In the meantime, dig up whatever you can on this Phearson guy."

* * *

"Carmichael. Hey Anita...Yeah, he's here...Lunch?" She glanced up at Jack and he nodded eagerly. Abbie smiled. "Mhmm...twenty minutes...sounds good...okay..see you then. Buh Bye," She hung up the phone and grabbed her coat. "Come on Jack, Anita's got a new case for us, and I'm starving." 

Jack held up a hand. "Let me just finish this," He heard an exaggerated sigh and looked up to see Abbie rolling her eyes and glancing at her watch. He chuckled and stood up, grabbing his coat. "Alright, alright, lets go."

"Thank you," Abbie said teasingly. She flung open the door to their office and headed out the door. "Come on old man, let's get a move on. I thought you were hungry."

* * *

"So after we arrest Percont, he tells the boys that the partner of the firm had orchestrated the whole thing because Carrie Ann was going to file a sexual harassment suit against him." Van Buren summed the case up, then bit into her Caesar salad. 

"What did Briscoe and Green come up with after checking into this partner guy?" Jack asked.

"Well, he called her apartment various times, messages were left on her voice mail ranging from teasing to totally vulgar, and there were at least five women willing to testify that he was a sexist pig." Van Buren said.

After jotting everything down, Abbie picked up her water and took a sip. "So what lawyer is this?"

"Some private guy on the Upper East side. Phearson and ...Steinhoffer, that was it. The perp is Phearson."

Abbie coughed and spit out her water, narrowly missing Van Buren. "Not... David Phearson?"

Van Buren looked at her with raised eyebrows and then checked her case files. "Actually it is. How did you know that?"

Abbie shot up, knocking her chair to the ground. Jack and Anita flinched, but Abbie didn't notice. "Excuse me," She whispered, and ran out, heading straight for the bathroom.

"What the hell was that?" Van Buren asked, looking completely bewildered.

" I have no idea," Jack said, standing up. "I'm gonna go check on her."

Van Buren nodded, and Jack headed to the bathroom. He knocked softly on the bathroom door. "Abbie?" He asked quietly. "You okay?"

"Shit," He heard her whisper from behind the door. Then, in a normal voice. "Just a sec, Jack."

Jack nodded and leaned against a wall as he waited for her to come out. The door flew open, and she stepped out, looking normal to the common passerby, but Jack knew her better. Her eyes were slightly red-rimmed and she was shaking.

He touched her shoulder lightly. "Hey, what's up?" He frowned when she flinched at his touch. "You okay?"

Abbie stepped back form a him, and gnawed on her thumbnail, a habit Jack had never seen her exhibit. "Um.. It's just that..this guy...do you...I can't...Do you remember that...uh..thing I told you?"

Jack raised an eyebrow and the corners of his mouth turned up. "You've told me a lot of things Abbie."

She let out a slightly hysterical shriek of laughter, but it turned into a heart wrenching sob. "About when I was in law school... and I got..r..raped?" She asked, tears pouring down her cheeks. "That was him Jack. David Phearson. That's who did it."

Jack looked at her for a few seconds, not knowing what to do. Then, watching her cover her eyes with shaking hand, he did the only thing that made sense. He hugged her to his chest, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close. "Jesus Abbie," He swore softly. Abbie's tears were soaking his shirt and he smoothed down strands of her silky hair. "It'll be okay, I promise."


	3. Emotions get in the way

**A/N- Sorry for the delay, a horrible combination of writers block and my word processor being broken made me completely unable to do anything productive. But the episode that inspired my fanfic in the first place was just on, and if that's not a hint that I should do some writing, I don't know what is. I know you don't care all that much, so I'll just get with the story.**

* * *

Jack sat at his desk, piles and piles of papers a testament to the fact that he had been working all day, and the end was far from being in sight. A quiet knock on his door interuppted his thinking, and he looked up and beckoned to Nora who was standing just behind the door. She came and and eyed his pile of work, and sat down at one the chairs facing his desk.

"Hey Jack, how's the brief on the McDonnell case coming?" She asked, crossing her legs and leaning back into her chair.

Jack sighed heavily and nodded towards one of the many piles. "It's somewhere in that heap, waiting for my attention. I should get to it at oh, around three o' clock tomorrow morning," he said, raising his arms above his head and stretching like a cat.

"Does the fact that Abbie's office is shut up like a drum have anything to do with the immense workload you seemed to have signed yourself up for?" Nora inquired, peering at him questioningly.

Jack pinched the bridge of his nose, a guesture that Nora knew too well. "Oh Jesus Nora, I don't know where to start."

Nora laughed a little and leaned toward him, her green eyes sparkling. "Try the begining Jack. It's always worked for me." Jack raised and eyebrow at her almost carefree tone, and responded abruptly, "If you're thinking what I think you are, though my history with my ADA's has been less than stellar, I assure you it's no joking matter.

Nora sobered immediately and looked contrite. "I'm sorry. What's up?"

Jack leaned back in his chair, and the leather groaned in protest. "I feel kind of uncomfortable telling you this, but I guess you have a right to know why your ADA isn't here," He sighed again and looked at Nora, his hazel eyes cackling with electricity. " A while ago, when Adam was still the DA, and Abbie had just been transferred here from Narcotics, we got a case about this girl who ordered a hit on the corrections officer while still in jail. Abbie was the one who had put the girl in jail the first time, and there was quite a bit of left over hostility. This girl, I think her name was Alice, was convinced that Abbie had it in for her, and they went head on a few times. I looked up the case myself, to see if Abbie had been extra harsh on her, but the crime and the punishment seemed to fit just fine. Anyway, I let Abbie do the cross, and Alice claimed that she had been raped by this guy, and he was terrorizing her daughter in the city. Of course, being Abbie, she refused to believe it, and she kept going after her. Alice looked at Abbie dead on and asked, "Have you ever been raped, Ms. Carmicheal?" I don't think anyone else had noticed it, but Abbie...she..froze. And the look in her eyes was like that of a wounded little girl. She finshed the cross just fine, but she was..not herself for the rest of the day."

He paused for breath, a noticed how wide Nora's eyes had gotten. "Then she told me that she wanted to offer the girl a plea. I was curious as to why, but I had seen the look in her eye. I didn't press her. So the girl takes the plea and yadda yadda yadda . As we were leaving I asked Abbie if she was okay. She said she was fine, that she just needed to decompress. I told her she could tell me if she wanted to, that I wasn't going to pass judgement on her. I thought she realized she was being a little tough on the girl. God knows I've made one too many mistakes like that. Abbie was quiet for a minute. Then she turned to me and said, "I was a freshmen. He was a third year law student. We were on a date. I didn't tell anyone. I blamed myself." And then she walked out," Jack looked up, surprised to see the comforting walls of his office and not the cold walls of Pine Hills correctional facility.

Nora had a hand over her mouth, and she was shaking. "Nora? Are you alright?" She nodded and waved for him to continnue.

"Where was I? Oh right. So yesterday, Abbie gets a call from Van Buren asking us to meet her at that little Italian place on 73rd and Madison. Van Buren presents us with this case, a girl was found strangled, beaten and raped in her apartment. I asked the perp's name and.." He trailed off seeing Nora's eyes widen in horror.

"It was him wasn't it Jack? The man that raped Abbie?" Jack nodded, and Nora closed her eyes. "Oh my God,"

"I told her to take some time off, and that she wasn't expected to do anything with this case. So here I am, with all this...shit," Jack waved at the piles of papers, and chuckled half heatedly. The noise made Nora wince, and she shook her head slowly.

"All this time, I used to get mad at her when we had a rape/homicide and she was always pushing for the worst, the death penalty if she could get it. I thought she was too zealous, or it was just her Texan roots that made her push for the death penalty. But it was him wasn't it? Abbie saw his face in every rapist that walked through these doors." Nora's voice was beaten, weary.

"Yeah, she did," Jack said woodenly. Suddenly an image flashed in his mind, Abbie, alone in her apartment, crying, shaking with the combined terror of being alone, and the idea that this man could have done the same to her. He reached for the phone, not even noticing Nora anymore. He dailed her number and waited.

"Hi, you've reached Abbie Carmicheal. I'm not here, so leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Thanks." The sound of her voice, like it used to be, carefree and husky made Jack's fingers long to close around this guys throat and never let go. The machine beeped impatiently and Jack cleared his thoat.

"Hey Abbie, It's Jack, just calling to see how you were doing...I guess you're not home, so just give me a call when you-" He was interrupted by the sound of clacking in his ear, and then a deep breath was exhaled. "Hey Jack."

Jack's eyes widened in surprise, and responded. "Hey, how are you?"

Abbie emitted a short, humorless laugh. "I'm great."

Jack closed his eyes as he heard the bitter timbre of her voice. Talking to her wasn't supposed to hurt this much. "What have you been up to?"

"Nothing, catching up on sleep, watching bad daytime television. You know, the normal day off kind of stuff."

Normal. Right. If Jack had ever heard her be fake, this was it. "Well okay. I was just checking in on you. Seeing how you were doing."

"Don't Jack, I'm fine. I'll be back tomorrow, I promise. I just..needed some time. Sorry if I left you with an ass load of work to do."

"Abbie, you don't have to come back tomorrow. Take the week, it's fine. There are a billion interns who would love to write up my case briefs. And you don't have to aplogize for needing today. I.." Jack trailed off. "I know how hard this is for you."

There was silence on the end of the line. Then a sharp intake of breath. "Jack, I need to get back to work. I hate hanging around here and being useless. And I'm fine, I was just a little shook up. I'll be as good as new in the morning. Please, don't worry about me."

Jack was quiet for a second. How did he tell her that he had never been so worried in his life? He chickened out. "Alright. Well, if you need anything, don't hesitate to call me."

"Okay. Bye Jack." A dial tone sounded in his ear, and he kept holding the phone, in shock, until Nora's voice brought him back to Earth. "Jack? Jack? How is she?"

He hung up the phone and shrugged. "She's trying to act like it's not a big deal, but I could tell she was about to lose it." He rested his elbows on his desk and sunk his salt and pepper hair into his hands. "What the hell do I do Nora?" The grief in his voice was undeniable and goosebumps spread on Nora's skin as she listened to him. She couldn't remember Jack this upset about anything, save for when Claire Kincaid died. But Nora hadn't been there, hadn't witnessed the grief personally, and was shocked to see so much raw emotion coming from him. "You did the best that you could, Jack. She knows she has you to talk to, and if she needs to, I'm sure she will."

Jack shook his head. "Abbie tries to pretend she doesn't need anyone. She always has to be hardass Abbie Carmicheal, never a human." A snort of laughter made him look up sharply. "Did I miss something?" He asked, not even trying to hide the bite in his voice.

Nora shook her head and stood up. "You and Abbie are more similar than you both would admit." She reached out and touched his shoulder. "She'll be okay Jack. Just give her time." She headed towards the door, then paused. "And Jack, try to leave by midnight okay? Last thing I need is you losing it during the McDonell case." She winked at him and slid gently out of the doors. Jack reached under his desk and pulled out a bottle of scotch and short glass. He poured what was sure to be the first of many, and got to work.

* * *

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­Abbie's skin was clammy and drenched in sweat. She had been trying to sleep for hours, but vivid images of David Phearson coming at her in her dorm room, this time with a knife clenched in his head made the task near impossible. Just thinking about him made her skin crawl, and suddenly the darkness of her bedroom seemed both terrifying and suffocating. Abbie sat up and switched the light on, her dark eyes flicking to every corner of her room, checking.

She was in the middle of swinging her legs over the side of the bed to check inside the closet when she realized how utterly pathetic she was being. _Come on Carmicheal, get a grip. He's not here, you're alone, and it's almost one o' clock in the morning. Seeing as you made the brilliant choice to go to work tomrrow, you really need the rest._ Abbie sighed laid back in her bed and silently willed her inner voice to shut the hell up. The thought of being alone wasn't as comforting as she wanted it to be. She laid a hand over her eyes and turned off the light again. Convincing herself not to notice how dark the room was, how eerily silent everything was, she slowly counted from one to a hundred in her head. It was a bedtime trick that had always helped her sleep. Abbie's eyelids felt heavy, and she felt sleep coming on. Suddenly, she wasn't in her bedroom anymore. She was lying in an empty apartment, where everything was white. A sharp pain eruppted in her back, and she spun around to find David's black eyes looking at her. A knife was clutched in his hand, and he laughed.

"Where you going Abbie? The fun's only started." He put both his hands on her shoulders and held her down. Abbie felt her skirt sliding off and she closed her eyes.

"Please, no. Not again. No, please, leave me alone." The pitiful mew of her voice made him laugh as he held her down, thursting hard into her. His wet lips did their best to latch on to her mouth, but she turned her head and he only made contact with her neck. David sucked enthustiastically, biting her earlobes as his bucking hips sped up. Abbie felt him release inside her, and he licked the tears off of her cheeks. "That wasn't so bad, was it?" He sneered. She thrashed underneath him and mananged to wrench an arm out. Abbie smacked him hard, and the blow sent him reeling. In his moment of confusion, she got out from under him and headed to the door, but as she ran it got farther away, and he kept closing in on her. A loud gunshot made her stumble, and a searing pain ripped through her back. Then everything went black.

Abbie sat up, sweat running off her in buckets, and reached out blindly for the phone. She glanced at the clock, praying that Jack would still be at the office, even though it was well after one AM.

* * *

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­

The phone ringing woke Jack up in a state of confusion. He relaxed and took stock of his surroudings. He was lying on the couch in his office, a few case files scattered around the floor. The phone kept ringing, and Jack stumbled over to his desk.

"McCoy," he mumbled, noticing how slurred the words were.

"Jack?" He sobered up immediately at the sound of Abbie's voice.

"Yeah, what's up? Are you okay?" He sat back in his chair and rubbed his eyes.

"Jesus, I feel so stupid. I just had this dream, and I was scared, and I didn't know who to call..." Her voice trailed off and he thought he could hear sniffling in the backround.

"Do you need anything?" He asked.

"No, I just wanted to hear someone's voice that wasn't my own. Ya know? I'll be fine Jack," But she paused, and he could hear the unasked question in her voice.

"Do you want me to come over?" He asked gently, deciding that she was probably too embrassed to ask.

He could hear her crying quietly into the phone. "I can't explain to you how...pathetic I feel right now," She whispered miserably.

"Abbie, it's fine. Give me ten minutes and I'll be there. Okay?"

"Okay." She sounded like a little girl, and it broke Jack's heart.

He grabbed his coat as fast as he could manage. The last thing he wanted to do was keep her waiting.

* * *

After she had unlocked the door, Abbie went back into her bedroom. She didn't know what it was that made her feel so safe there, but there was nowhere else she would rather be. When the knock sounded at her door she yelled for Jack to come in, slightly surprised that he got there so quickly.

Jack followed the sound of her voice, and then stood in the doorway uncomfortably when he realized that this was her bedroom. He glanced around, surprised that her bedroom was so..inviting. It was a deep eggplant, the trim done a light green.All the funiture matched, mahogany, and the air was permeated with a heady jasmine and vanilla scent.

Abbie pulled her knees to her chest and laid her over them, watching Jack survey her room with a slight hint of amusement. "Hey there McCoy," She said softly. "Are you going to stand there all day?" Jack glanced at her, her bed, and a chair that sat in the far corner. A sigh escaped his lips and he sat on the edge of the bed, it groaning as he gingerly sat down.

"Are you okay? Really?" He looked at her, and the warm concern for her in his eyes made her want to cry.

"I'm just a little shook up I guess," She sighed and reached for a glass of water that was on her nightstand.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Jack asked, unable to keep the concern out of his voice.

Abbie sighed. "I'm so goddamn sick of thinking about it that I could scream," her voice dropped to a whisper. "And all I want to do is sleep, but everytime I close my eyes I see him coming at me. Everything about that night is so excruciatingly clear. All the details, all the times I could have screamed for help, hit him. punched him, done anything about it. But I sat there like a goddamn baby, to fucking scared to anything but whisper "No" over and over," She pressed the heels of her hands into her eyes as her body shuddered. "Even though I told myself it wasn't my fault, how was I supposed to think otherwise? Because I was too much of a fucking coward to do anything, this guy got to walk away, and kill this poor girl," She looked at Jack searchingly, her eyes bright with unshed tears. "Now, how the hell am I supposed to think that this wasn't my fault?"

Jack peeled off his coat and moved closer to Abbie on the bed, and laid a comforting hand on the side of her face. He wiped away falling tears with his thumb, wishing he could take her in his arms and tell her he loved her. "You know this wasn't your fault Abbie," He said softly, his heart wrenching as she pulled away from him an buried her head in her arms.

She sobbed quietly for awhile, then looked at her with those enormous dark eyes. "I can't believe I'm going to ask you this, but will you stay with me tonight? I don't think I can be alone anymore."

Jack considered telling her that he would do anything for her, but instead nodded. "Do you want me to stay on the floor?"

Abbie moved over, creating a space next to her on the queen-sized bed. "Please Jack," she pleaded, laying her hand on the empty space on the bed.

His head pounded with the need to comfort her, the desire to be with her, and the considerable amount of scotch he had drank before. He nodded, swallowing thickly. He kicked off his shoes, and crawled up the bed and slid under the covers, lying next to her. Abbie reached out and turned out the light, then turned back to the bed. Jack could feel her moving uncomfortably around the bed, trying to get comfortable.

"Carmicheal?" He asked, his voice gruff with exhaustion. "Could you lay still for three seconds please?" He heard her snort and then something hit him square in the chest.

"Sorry. I can't seem to get comfortable," She mumbled. It sounded like she was underneath the blankets. He could feel her wriggling closer, and closer until her head was lying on his chest. "That's better," Abbie sighed.

Jack lay still for a mintute, then slowly put his arm around her, growing bolder as her felt her snuggle against him. "Night Abbie," Jack mumbled, finally comfortable himself.

"Sleep tight Jack."

* * *

**A/N Okay, so Abbie ends up in Jack's arms again. But really, who doesn't want to end up in his arms? Next, Phearson is arrested, but Jack is in need of people who will testify against him. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? ;) **


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